Isn't it funny how I always turn to this friggin' journal thingy when I'm feeling NOT so well? I think this will be the only healthy habit I'll ever develop. I'm not even sure if it's healthy.
Lately I've been confused and all my confusion just led to a shit-load of pain. I'm a kind of person who find it hard to trust and now, when I finally got the courage of being honest to myself, the person who I thought I could trust turned his back on me. He made me believe a million things only to spit on my face. He's a jerk, I know, but I still can't imagine that he'll be out of my life and that everything that he said to me were just his idea of a joke. You see, I think I've swallowed more than I could chew here. And nothings helping me. I might end up choking on my own stupidity. Maybe that's what I deserve, right? I just hope all this would stop. I just want everything to stop. I feel like my head is going to explode. I feel so heavy that I couldn't even get up.